The Noble Pagan Forums - Better late than never...

Hello...I am Angelicdarma. I am an open book. If I rattle, just tell me to shut up, and I graciously will. NO feelings hurt...

I was raised and grew up in/with the christian faith. Some members of family are die hard Christians and others believe in something. Several members of my family, believe in God but don't have to go to man mad church to worship. I have tried on other these styles and lean towards the latter two. Since I was a child, I have been sensitive to other worldly things. I could see and talk to spirits, and this made people including my mother very uncomfortable. Also with the devout Christians in my family, I have been at odds with by the christian faith and few members of my family. My daughter has recently came out to me, that she can see spirits etc. She was afraid to come out to me, fearing that I thought she was crazy. (This is how I felt most of my life.)

I consider, myself more "spiritual" than religious. I know that there is a lot of powers to be out there. I have always been at one with nature and many other aspects of different religions/faith and/or beliefs. This is where the devout christian views of my family, put me at odds. But I have always been open to learning about other religions/faiths etc, because there are a lot beautiful things in a lot of religions/faiths etc. It seems that a lot of them share the same concept i.e. nature, karma and the list goes on. And perhaps, all religions stemmed from one "religion", one "faith", more god or being...

My heritage, I believe has allows me to be more open to many things. I come from mainly pagan/Anglo-Saxon/Irish/Scandinavian decent with a little Lakota and Cherokee thrown into the mix. I can feel the energy towards pagan and Native Indians beliefs and faith. I am at peace when I am outside enjoying nature, especially around water and mountains. Unfortunately, I have not had a lot of guidance towards anyone of these faiths and beliefs. I am wanting to find my way spiritually and my place in the world.

My daughter came to me about a month ago, that she wanted to convert to Wicca/Paganism based on some things she has experienced. But also, I think she and her friends are wanting become Wicca/pagan because it's the cool thing to do right now. At the same time, is dissatisfied with the christian faith and what the man made church is all about. I have let her go to different churches of different faiths, with her friends. So when she would get old, could make her own decisions. I toward her that I need to learn more myself first, from a trusted source...That is where Mr. Jabby Bear or Cloudrunner comes into play. I met him during our days of WoW, and would trust him with my life.

I am hoping to learn a lot from both the site and the peeps.

*hugs*

Have you read some of the other forum posts here? Rattling on is a TNP tradition!

*hugs back*

Hellosies!
And welcome aboard ( again). Runner of Clouds is an awesome person indeed. I've had the pleasure of befriending him online and in real life ( I hope you get to try his BBQ pork....he is the best BBQ bitch a friend could ask for ).

Don't worry about rambling on and on and on and on here. If you've seen any of the novels I try to pass off as posts you will soon see here that we enjoy and I think even look forward to bouts of rambling, tangenting and babbling on. It is what ( I think) makes this place so special ( in a good way of course ).

There is lots of info here and if you canna find something you are looking for then just ask and someone will answer. And if no one knows? Just smack me upside with a (preferably soft) brick and I'll go look out the answer for you. That is what I do. Attract soft bricks that is.....

Honestly though if there is anything I can do fer ya lemme know.



C/S/

__________________

Hello, Angelicdarma!

I liked your eloquent introduction.



I recently attended a Meetup where everyone talked about their religious heritage, and found myself rather tongue-tied when I tried to talk about my own. You would have fit right in with everyone else in the group. People I thought I knew had a much richer religious origin than I thought they did.


To the rest of the expectant peeps : I'm still working on mine, but right now, the holidays are getting in the way. Oh well, later.

So ladies and gents this is my MUCH better half. Lets get one thing straight i wear the pants in my family she just tells which ones im allowed to put on( i may or may not have stole that statement from cloud). I guess i have to agree with her that i also need to figure shit out b4 i start trying to guide the young one, the problem is they grow up so damn fast. I can remember a few years back i got the simple questions, ya know standard stuff if im good do i go to heaven if i die nice and easy generic answers. Earlier this year she comes to me and asks why i worship the devil POW not so simple of an answer, i ask for an elaboration, in which i get told if i believe in evolution that i worship the devil. Come to find out a youth pastor at a church she had been visiting, like darma said we had given her freedom to choose her own path, scoffed at her when she had told a friend that most creatures had evolved from dinosaurs and she hadnt seen or heard anything in the bible about dinosaurs yet. Then the misguided youth told her believing in evolution was the same as worshiping the devil. This was a real kick in the pants lucky for me i have a friend that is a chaplin at the hospital here and i got a very nondenominational (if i spelled that right i get a big word point )answer that satasfied the curious one for a bit. But now im getting alot of questions on my irish heritage and about wicca and dont know how to answer most of them. So i will probably start posting them here as i cant think of any specific ones right now. Well enough rambling from me for now and by the way happy thanksgiving since its 1:30 am 11/26 and i am bored as hell at work.

Yes, you stole that one from me .

oh wow ... I didn't realize where the source came from LOL. What a fucked up thing to say to a child.

Anyway, you guys are in the right spot.

Darma, I got your homework assignment and yer dead on , all you gotta do is take it step by step and practice a little each day.

Sorry my response is abit short, I've succumbed to the depression that sets in once you realize that everything you've worked for is going to disappear soon ...

Oh, Cloudrunner! *hugs* You still have your friends! Keep going, though times may be hard now, they will not always be so. I have recently been through a stage of my life where I lost everything: job, wife, kids, house, but I came through with help from my friends, and you can do it too!

For SamnDarm,
I'll see what I can roust up on Wicca for you. It's something I looked into(practiced blah blah blah blah) for mannnnny years however I am not traditional. Ecclectic does na quite cover it either......though solitary does.
So any info you get from me will be based on what I have come across, practiced,blah blah blah. I should warn you I am not a very ritualistic person ( ask CR he can tell you how I throw one together .....they always turn out great though IMO).
How old is your lil un? That way I can ask around ( look around ) for some good starter kit info for her age bracket.
Hell.
Here.
Email me.
!


pixieblu67@hotmail.com

Oh no! Now my secret identity is out in the open! Le Gasp!


CloudRunner hun.....
*hugs*
Been there done that. Only I willingly gave it all up and then got so bit in the ass the only thing I did have were my friends who are family and my kids. I thought I had lost everything. Even worse, given it all away.And it sucked. In the end....that was the best thing ( and worst experiences in change) that ever happened to me.

Try hun to flip it aside for a moment. Slap me for being Perky Polly, Obnoxiously Optimistic Olivia, or Silly Spiritual Selena here.....I'll take the hit because I honestly believe that this is happening because you are stubborn, were stuck in a rut that made you miserable on the inside even if you were successful on the outside and your Goddess hates to see you do that to yourself and others around you.
Change sucks. Change is hard. Changer hurts and is described by words that if I uttered would break my monitor and have TNP in therapy for years due to exposure.
In the end though Change is good. Even if we have to experience it by being dragged through a shredder.
We love you. We are all here for you. Those you know, do not know, have been with and have never met.
Goddess pulled the rug out from under your feet to get you going again. To get you where you need to be.
Granted it would be nice if you got the details and roadmap. Let me know if you ever get one. I'd like to share it or borrow it from you.
So feel free to sling some angry carribou at me if you are feeling that I don't understand how frustrated and sad you are. I'll take it if that is how you feel.
Because I love you.
We all do.

*hugs*

Once your slate is clean, the only thing left is to draw all over it anew.There is only up from there.

C/S/

__________________

Cloudrunner: Have been there too. The strength of your spirit is so clear that I have no doubt you will overcome any obstacle... and if you need any help, pray to Eleggua, Orisha of change. He will help you discover the message behind the changes and challenges he brings to our lives.
If there is anything I can do for you, just PM me. I'll be more than glad to help.

thank you thank you......

I think I have found my place sort to speak. (Forgive my flip flopping of words, sleep deprivation is not kind.)

I do and will rant and rabble a bit. But I am trying to keep it in check to a point, I have found those that can't stand it. Tend not to be the people I like to hang out with when I can truly see their true colors. I have not mastered breaking true the brick wall of false facades yet. I am learning, but it is hard. That damn loyalty to a fault is a strength and weakness of mine.

There are a lot of far right wing ignorant people here. Fear based is a better word or phase perhaps. Tell them something, and they will just listen and believe whatever you tell them. I DO NOT think I am able live in or around these people anymore. I have told my daughter for several years, that they don't know what they are talking about. Listen to the words coming out of your mouth, do you really hear yourself???

Plus, I met my sister in law or actually soon to be sister in law family today. They were shocked when they found out that we don't go to church. I was scoping them out, so I didn't think I needed to correct them at the moment. But this also brought back memories of my grandfather...

HE was a devout christian, who didn't believe you had to go to church to believe in or worship. He was chastised for this, and he didn't care the least bit.

And she has now, learned this on her own. This way I have turned to Jabby Bear aka Cloudrunner for help. I know he wouldn't steer me wrong.

I am a BAD PARENT dun'cha ya know. LOL. But it seems, that so far the way I/WE have raised her, I/WE am doing something right. People are amazed how well mannered, my kid is. How open she is to suggestions, thoughts, or ideas, they are shocked. And that she respects their ideas/thought systems etc. SHE DOESN'T rag on them, she accepts them for who THEY ARE. My daughter is and has threating people, her peers and some adults (teachers) that they have and are questioning her. But she has, a lot of strong "old soul" teachers, watching her back. ANd are encouraging her to stand her ground as well.

For example, my daughter almost went down for a class 3 felony last spring. A girl, stole the keys to a school from a janitor. Use said keys to "break in" and my daughter's other friend went inside. While my/our daughter, stayed outside to watch friend's baby brother. Daughter was questioned several times, both by Sammy aka Samhein plus police officers or resource officers w/e. Her story never budged, and she near got in trouble. Her friend went in because she was trying to get in the "kool kids klub" and learned her lesson.

She has been sent into the counselor's office several times now. And she is the one walking out of the office, putting the counselor and everyone else in their place. IE..she is trying to be "goth", but is walking to her own drummer. Best to say she is a "hippie, punk rocker, skater girl/chic, free spirit". She writes phone numbers on her hands/arms. She also writes phrases or let her true friends write on her pants/binders/book covers to express herself. "THEY are worried, becaude she might be cutting herself. PFFFFFT. She has left the office yet again after she tells them no, and/or shows her arms to show she has no signs of cutting. Her question to the counselor..."haven't you ever wrote a number on your hand/arm, when there's no paper to be found any WHERE????

AND, I do not and will not let her, lose her free spirit and conformed to others. I did this, after I fought it for so many years and succumb, I am heeding my own advise. (If I can't, why should she listen to me??)

I put my family, friends, daughter all before myself and I lost my way. I am trying to find myself. I am taking a stand. I am starting to put myself first again or a close second and not in 10th place. Never again. I hate confrontation, but I am working to correct that. I will stand my ground and tell them how it is. Unfortunately, my work is killing me and I can not say or tell them how it is, because I am the one with the bad attitude. And the one's kissing arse etc etc, are the ones right now being listened too.

I need this job right now for the health benefits and few other benefits, that I am taking yet another one for the team ie hubby and daughter. It will be my time, that they will the one's taking one for the team and me, and I will be the one, who is taking care of.

This is also where my belief of karma comes into play. And it has never failed my before. Plus, everything has a way to work it's way out.

which moves me to you Jabby BEar aka CR....
things do happen for a reason....
things may seem like they can't get any worse...
things will get better....
look at the signs, no matter how little or insignificant them may appear...
these will help you find your way...
I believe that story couldn't have said it better..

I have strayed from this for the most part,
while still trusting my intuition,
HOWEVER
forgot to watch the signs,
theses are what helped me turn on the lights...
helped my to recognize my weakness..
seek out the help of others...
put my pride on the back burner...
and this has helped me and Sammy get thru his illness.

I as well, hate me job...
but I help people...
this is one of the toughest times...
THE GREAT RECESSION, w/e they want to call it...
I have not steered from my principals, ethics..
and I will come out on the top...

I have been leaning toward moving to Colorado..
to get away from these christian, man made churches...
if will help in any other facets of my life...
there have been signs again...

I found out today, my sister and brother in law are looking to get, out of Florida and move to colorado..
in the same general area...
the friends I have met in WoW, either live, thinking about moving, or are in the process of moving to Colorado...

and Mr. Jabby Bear, I believe that Sammy said something that you mentioned something about Colorado...

am I or am i not right?