You look at my title and perhaps think "WTF? How does property HAVE property?!" Well "technically" with the civil war we abolished humans as property of other humans. BWAHAHAHA. Welcome to the government and it's teat of sweet seduction. You get your housing. And your food. Medical too! And your base pay. Kinda like Welfare. Only ... if you miss an appointment on Welfare they take your benefits. If you refuse orders ... ouch. They own you. You are property. And it goes even beyond that...
Welfare encourages you to get smart and become independent. Military wants you to suck the teat of potential human cannon fodder until you are no longer a worthy cog.
My hubby is government property. He is a man so "technically" he is not property (don't give a hickey though or watch as punishment ensues for damaging said "non-property"). He treats me like the independent individual I am so technically I am not property either. Oh but I am. In the sweet teat's eyes ... and not only am I property of property, I as well as my children, are representatives of the property that we are property of. Confusing?
Well if my son is issued a military ID card and loses it, it can be technically faulted to my husband ... no pressure here folks ... none at all ...
I come across all sorts of interesting tidbits about military associated women. Funny I should find myself in this spot. I never dreamed let alone planned to be in this place. I still refer to our soldiers as "barcodes" and "ants". With respect this time though.
Military women ... what an interesting species. As a part of this category just WHAT am I allowed to feel???
You see the bulletins ... about how God made women strong blah blah blah but military women are stronger because blah blah blah.
Let's look at the blah blah blah of the military Spousal Unit. For just one moment ... because sure our spouses are judged by their job status ... as support modules though, us spousal units have our own battles of judgment to fight against (and it helps us good ones none so much at all when you find the spousals that not only fall, but saunter delicately and with flair into the stereotypes others put on this category ... or even worse when THESE stereotypes make it to prime-time as characters in a show named something like “Military Housewife lives” presented to you by some channel like Hallmark or Life or Encore ...)
I tangent ... so what are those stereotypes again?
- Technically they (spousal units) could be classified as crazy because when the active participant is gone they (spousal unit) take on a whole new personality.
- Strong, independent, cold, controlling, efficient, self sustained.
- When their spouse comes back they are to take on a new personality accommodating his (her) needs for his (her) role in the family unit.
- They are also to adjust the family too. And everything else.
- If THAT does not describe a shift in personality and self willed or an environmentally depicted shift in perception ...
- They (spousals) listen to people (perhaps friends) complain about how terrible their sex lives are. Wah. If you have a faithful Spousal Unit you have an abstinant one. No sex. No cuddles. No kisses. No romance. No back up. No support. No nothing. NOTHING. AT ALL. You and your imagination (no matter how wild ... just is NOT the same).
- However if you dance and saunter along the lines of the stereotypical Spousal then you have it easy because you are a whore.
- Oh ... Woe on you and yours. An affront at best.
- They (spousals) deal with all kinds of situations with no support system from their spousal. Why? See Iraq. And other war situations.
- They (spousals) are supposed to be independent and fine, yet missing him and alone all at once.
- Strong and yet weak rolled into one simultaneous mobius strip lined moment. Now tell me THAT alone is not a recipe for some form of mental illness in and of itself (depression, anxiety, paranoia, insecurity, OCD, etc).
Oh the list goes on.
On the other hand ...
- They (spousals) are cash cows looking for an easy marriage.
- Military hubbies = not having to work.
- Stupid dogs in heat.
- They are lying deceitful whores living off of another branch of welfare after they got booted FROM welfare.
I have been on welfare and find nothing great about it so my thought to that is:
??????????????????????????????????
And of course the list goes on. In either direction.
I do not fall under either category. However regardless of whatever category is out there, doesn't everything of the complaining nature become negated under the "well you married into it, you should have known/expected it?"
I dunno. I hope not.
From the inexperienced and naive to the system abusing *edits* out there ...
Am I allowed to groan and moan? When things get bad for me am I allowed or did I sign some similar contract my active spouse did ... only I never got formally informed however I get all the benefits of being judged just as harshly??
Am I allowed to think horrid thoughts like "STFU!!!! WAH!!!! YOU HAVE THE FLU AND DON'T FEEL LIKE TAKING CARE OF YOUR KID!!!! F******* WAH!!! HUBBY WON'T WAKE UP WITH THE BABY ... BOOHOO!!! I DON'T HAVE A F****** HUSBAND UNTIL THE MILITARY GIVES ME MY SLOT!!! MY SLOT??? LOOK AT MY CALENDAR!!! FOUR MORE MONTHS!!! MAYBE SIX??!!! A YEAR??!!! F*** OFF YOU SPINELESS INSECURE PIPSQUEAK SOULLESS WRETCH!!! GROW A F****** BACK BONE AND F******* DEAL WITH IT!!!! LIFE IS FAR FROM FAIR!!!!!! F****** GROW UP YOU WHINING PUDDLE OF RUNOFF!!!!"
Am I allowed to shut down? Knowing what I married into am I allowed to weep at night and beg for the comfort of my husband's warm arms? On a bad day? Just for a moment? Am I allowed to admit that spritzing his shirt with his cologne and smelling it, really doesn't work? That it is a farce to attempt to console me? Am I allowed to miss him or am I to accept it as an exceptionally long work day?
Or is this all part of my job and I should just smile happily in all the right places as if I were Vanna White getting ready to offer a key vowel?
Am I allowed to get irritated when someone is freaking out on a tiny tiny issue (OMG we caught LICE and I dunno what to do and my husband is not here and I SOoOoOoO need him to hold my hand through this) when I had to FIGHT for the right to have mine here through a major surgery? And then fight for an extension? And then lose?
Sure I have it easier than some. I have a roommate. One of my best friend's. My daughter's father to be exact . For anyone who feels the need to get the details on that (and they are not as sordid as our society would lovingly dictate, for ratings alone if nothing else) feel free to contact me.
He's sweet and he is dear. And I know he is here for me. It's not the same thing. Not that I am ungrateful. My sanity has much to thank for in his direction (he keeps me smiling, is great with our daughter and my son and helps out immensely).
There are some things you confide in or feel with your spouse (if you are lucky I suppose, for I have heard of horror stories in regards to marriages) that you do not confide in others. I miss that when he is gone. And I cannot tell him because he misses it too and it makes him feel bad. And I cannot tell my friends because they have nothing to offer or worse have “that thought” in the back of their head (but you married into it ... what DID you expect?).
I can talk to my friends. My best friends. It's not the same. There are times that I just want to hold in the tears and then sob them into my husband's arms. Because that is okay. Because I can't pent up forever. Because I miss him. Because, because ... because ...
That is not the point.
Do I have the right?
Or is that along the line of someone accepting chemotherapy and watching them complain "It hurrrrrts!!!!". Same thing right? Is it though? Really?
What is the right reaction? Which one? Why are we judged? To whom can I admit to being human without thinking that they are thinking "well doll you married it. You should have been prepared."?
Are we (Spousals) really human? The public depictions have us decreed as voluntary soulless soldiers or carefree sows and whores. I am neither.
I want the right to cry without having to defend myself with a fist in someone's face. A lot. Particularly during deployments ...
I am not ungrateful for the friends (and best/close friends) that I have. You guys mean so much to me and manage to keep me going when I am like this. I have no idea how to show how thankful I am to you.
I am just venting about how I wonder how I am allowed to portray my feelings as a military wife. If I am allowed any. I should be, because I am human and we all have feelings. However the government has a nasty tendency to twist and pervert things. This leaves me at a loss.
He’s been through three deployments. Each time he has come back is more and more interesting. Who can we talk to?
Trust me ... no one directly or indirectly (i.e. through marriage) signed up for THIS knowledgeably and knowingly ...
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Re: Property of Government Property 
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